Don is great, Don is good...

 let us thank Don for our food, by his hands we all are fed, give us Don our daily Don.



Don is the fucking man, nobody can fuck with him.  He's such a great Don and I cannot wait to help you all get to know him better.  Today he made a child's wish come true, it would have been a dying wish, but Don healed her.  I'm getting a head of myself here...


Today a little girl went looking for vengeance.  Her father had been murdered in some state out west.  No one was searching for the outlaw...until she found Don.  She was looking for a man with 'true grit', and she believed she had found that man/deity.  She was right.  "I'm a man who has true grit" he boldly declared in an accent way better than any ever conceived by that fucking hack John Wayne.

 Don looked something like this, except a lot more bad ass.

(pictured above: fucking hack)

Editor's Note: If you haven't seen "True Grit", this post may confuse you.  If you have seen "True Grit", take it easy on me, it's been a few weeks, I don't remember it all that well.  Point being, if you haven't seen the movie I will ruin the ending for you.  If that happens, I will have saved you from hearing the movie's characters saying the title of the movie a billion times

When you finish practicing your 'A-B-Cs' maybe you can work on not sounding so stupid when you say 'True Grit'

So they hopped in Don's truck and headed for the west.  Donald Shaw don't need no stinking GPS.  By the way, this mid-20s man taking a pre-pubescent girl cross-country totally wasn't weird.  Donald Shaw is, as previously discussed, infallible, and at the very least more trustworthy than Jesus Christ.  

Some Native Americans were killed, Don bitch slapped a man who for some reason thought it was appropriate to whip the little girl, all kinds of western side adventures were had.  Like 5 minutes later Don caught and murdered the murderer.  This should have been the end of the story. 


Unfortunately/Deservedly, the stupid little girl fell into a fucking deep ass snake pit.  Don pulled her out and murder all the snakes for being such creepy, gross, evil creatures.  The stupidly little girl had been bit.  So Don healed the snake bite (suck it Bear Grylls). 

Picture all those snakes in a deep ass cave.  Fuck me, I'm never going out west if they really have shit like this.

Don is like the make a wish foundation, but with a better motto.   Still, Don was kind of annoyed by the girl's ignorance, so he cut off her arm to teach her a lesson about asking someone for too many favors(what can I say?  He can be a cruel Don.).   

Don-A-Wish:  "Making dreams come true, healing people, kicking ass, and when appropriate, taking names"
Long story short, Don killed the asshole outlaw, fulfilled the little girl's wish, healed her wound, and then put the pimp hand down.  How many times i gotta say it?...Just another day in the life.

"Music, money, mayhem"...for schizzle.
Editor's Note:I may actually have to see this movie...Note 'Avon Barksdale' and 'Marlo Stanfield' from HBO's "The Wire"